The other day I was droning on and on and on and on ( you get the idea) about how happy I would be once I finally get a million dollars. My husband looked at me and said, "You won't be happy even once you get a million dollars."
At first, I was pissed. I felt insulted, hurt and annoyed that he believed that a million dollars would not make me happy because come on, it's a million dollars. Who wouldn't be happy with a million dollars. Then, I thought about it. As much as it sickens me, I think he is right.
All too often I focus on happiness as something I'll have in the future.
I used to say, once I lose 40 pounds I'll be happy. Then, I lost 40 pounds and you know what? I still wasn't happy.
I used to say, once I am married I'll be happy. I've been married for 6 years and you know what? As much as I love my husband with every fiber of my being I'm still not happy.
I used to say, once I get out of high school and away from all the people who bully me I'll be happy. I've been out of school for 10 years as of this year and I'm still not happy.
What does all this tell me? It's not the things going on in my life, the things that will come into my life or even the people in my life holding me back from being happy. The only thing that has been constant is me. I'm the only one holding myself back from happiness.
So, with all this said, I think I need to just focus on being happy regardless of my environment. I'm the only REAL thing in my way of happiness. I need to commit 100% to being happy overall. Right now!